Captain America 3: Psychoanalyzed

***SPOILER ALERT***

It is fun to psych-evaluate the great Marvel superheroes.....more so due to the fact that in this 13th installment of Marvel Cinematic Universe, the main plot is not being thrashed around by a legendary villain. It is the division of viewpoints and ideals between two bona fide leaders of the Avengers. Why did this breach occur after all this time? They seemed to be getting along pretty well for the last 4 years since The Avengers. Zemo, the lurking up-to-no-good-and-vengeance-seeking Sokovian brings forth a true fact lost inside Hydra archives for 25 years. That fact only fueled the increasing deterioration of trust between teams #Cap and #Stark. So what the HELL happened?

Answer: the Avengers have ditched team play in this film and stuck up to their individual agendas and mindsets. The catalyst was the Sokovia Accords, ratified by 117 countries under the United Nations, which state that the actions of the enhanced beings should be brought under UN control, as their unsupervised missions leave a shocking collateral damage to life and property in the vicinity. However, surprising the audience and turning heads, Captain Rogers rears against the Governments, whereas Stark agrees to following the Accords. The rest followed one than the other, with well-defended reasons. Let us see why the two, leading the greatest team on the Earth, split up.


CAPTAIN AMERICA

He is a super soldier who would give his life for his country. Inherent goodness, profound loyalty and his faith in people course through his veins, which enable him to fight against anything threatening his team. But this is a man born in a period of great political turmoil and World Wars. Back in 1945, he had a clear understanding of good and evil. Nazis, bad. Allies, good. He had three close friends: Bucky Barnes, the genius scientist Howard Stark and the SSR spy Peggy Carter. When he is defrosted 70 years later, the only one alive (that he knew of) is Carter, bedridden and suffering from amnesia.

Peggy dies in Civil War and Cap doesn't get a chance to say goodbye. He's heartbroken, and feels a man out of his time once again. When Bucky Barnes resurfaces and pleads innocent to having any connection with the UN bombing, Captain believes him as he longs for that old lost friendship tethering him to this new world ravaged by the likes of SHIELD and HYDRA. Steve only wants his friend back and preferably not chased by the authorities. Losing everyone you knew your whole life can be very difficult, so of course you would root for anyone you definitely know to be good. Now be honest, even you were smiling when the two 100-year-old pals cracked jokes about the simpler days of the 20th century. And Cap is a loyal friend whom you can bet won't leave Barnes's side ever, for better or for worse. This overprotective friendship weighs wrongly in front of the whole world including Tony Stark.

Another important question is, why Captain goes against the Accords in the first place. Well, normally he would abide by anything his country demands of him. That was easy in WWII SSR days. The mission was simple: protect the American soldiers and fight against the Axis. Now, after being 'reborn' he has been dropped into the whirlwind of covert missions by SHIELD riddled with compartmentalization, which didn't sit easy with him. In Captain America: The Winter Soldier he argues against Nick Fury because doing his patriotic job was in direct conflict with what the agency actually wanted. Feeling played and used isn't a good secure feeling, everyone would agree. Moreover when SHIELD turns out to be HYDRA, his arch-enemy group, he loses his faith in people sitting on the diplomatic thrones of the world. He now believes only the Avengers themselves can truly differentiate between good and evil, and isn't thrilled with the Sokovia Accords which might take that delicate power out of their hands. "If we sign this, we lose our right to choose", Cap says. That people running the United Nations also have agendas, he argues, and agendas are liable to change, like what had happened before with SHIELD. You can see now where the balance tips.

However he promises to Stark that he would never shy away from helping when the team needs him, when the world needs him. He promises to be the incognito member of the Avengers, which only proves that ultimately, despite all those huge differences, he wouldn't leave their side when needed. The world will always face overwhelming danger and he's aware that his duty is to help, not hide. Unfortunately going into hiding right now is better than being locked up as a federal criminal, but he's aware that enhanced power should be kept safe to be used later. This sense of duty in the end is what rightfully makes him Captain America.


IRON MAN

This is a man who has it all. Like he says it himself in The Avengers, Tony Stark is a genius, billionaire, playboy and philanthropist. Brought up in an almost royal household with all the money, fame and fortune in the world, its no wonder that Tony Stark has an equally massive ego and arrogance. He used to run Stark Industries for weapons manufacture and military applications, but fortunately or unfortunately, witnessed his own missiles being used against his country and all the other innocent people of the world. With a spurt of conscience mixed with traumatic personal experience, he shuts down the weapons manufacture until he decides to put the money into good use. This is the first sign of personal and professional growth he has since he put on the burden of looking after all the business by himself.

Next comes the alien invasion, where he acknowledges that some things are bigger than him, out of his puny control. Every other avenger is out of commission, and he takes it upon himself to stop Loki carrying out his insane plan to create a portal in the sky. While he fails initially, he eventually manages to be the hero who sends the nuclear missile out of Earth's vicinity and as a result becomes a victim of severe panic attacks and PTSD. His home is destroyed, his Pepper whisked away from him just because of a 'wrong' he had committed to an over-ambitious fellow a decade ago. Life presents one challenge after another, finally topping it with the creation of Ultron. This mistake of his costs the lives of several Sokovians, and he knows it. He accepts it and has to live with it. It eats at his soul, and if he has even one chance to make all of it right, he is ready to give up his own life. So yes, painful experiences have shaped even a miserable selfish jack-ass like Stark to own up his choices and live like a decent human being. But holding his own isn't very easy, especially now that Pepper isn't talking to him. Usually one needs love and humane support to go through soul searching.

But his love for engineering and building machines hasn't been affected a bit. It's like breathing, but using his brain instead of lungs. He genuinely believes in philanthropy by donating funds to scientific advancements, no matter how big or small. Using his wealth, power and technology, Stark wants to carve out a better future, not to destroy it like he did 8 years ago. The deaths in Sokovia and Nigeria, when brought into attention by Secretary Ross, leaves him reeling under all those emotions and burden, leaving him with only one plausible course of action. To halt more imminent destruction. Because threats will always come, but the unplanned guns-a-blazing intervention of the superheroes will only damage what good is left in the world. Like his military expeditions, their enhanced powers "need to be put in check". He urges Captain to consider the gruesome aftermath of their heroism, and pleads more than once in the film to come over to the side of the Accords.

However he has a change of mind when he sees that the wrong person is being convicted for the UN bombings, and is prepared to let the whole matter slide. He plans to see it through with the Captain to put an end to the team fight, because it has been keeping him on the edge of his senses far too much than he likes to admit. But sadly now that he finds out that Barnes had killed his parents, Tony Stark snaps. One can hold on to sanity and emotions for so long. Not for any recent crimes, he only wants to see Barnes punished for the single most important loss in his life, because he feels it would justify everything he has undergone since the age of 21. Instead of blaming the circumstances, he blames Barnes along with Cap who refuses to leave his best friend's side. Shunning him outright, telling Cap, "You don't deserve that shield" is a huge turning point in the film. Once his anger subsides, he notoriously lets Captain get away with the breaking out of other enhanced prisoners, because in his heart he knows that this little feud regarding his lost family doesn't matter anymore in the grand scheme. He accepts that Captain is acting out of the goodness in his heart, and though legally he cannot co-operate with him anymore, he doesn't dispose of the possible idea of being Cap's good friend again in a better future.

[Pictures from Google images]

THE BAY REVISITED: PART III

It was ten minutes to 5 in the morning when I woke up. The room was already in a mini scurry by then. Everyone was putting on their beach clothes and was as ready as ever to explore the beach at dawn. Sitting up groggily on the bed, I stifled my yawn and tried to look very excited. Truth be told, I'm kind of a late riser. Everywhere I'd visited, I'd never woken up at dawn just to look at the sky except when we had to go somewhere special. So what was different this time? I smiled, chanting the promise I'd made to myself before setting on this tour. From now on, I would enjoy every bit and second observing the nature around me, and keep the sleeping part for when I get back home.

Fifteen minutes later I was walking by the paved path of the resort towards the beach. The sky was a deep shade of blue and black. Clouds were storming in more than ever. There goes my chance of seeing the sunrise, I thought sadly. But I tried to keep my spirits uplifted. Anyhow we wouldn't have got a good picture of sunrise even if the sky was clear. The Sun rose from the exact opposite side of the sea, that is, from behind the line of resorts on the beach. That was truly surprising, but I was nevertheless happier seeing that I hadn't missed much after all.

It was, what you could call, a romantic weather. The sky was threatening to pour on us, but we knew there was fat chance of that happening. The wind was on the verge of blowing us away, and I was sure the breeze had got stronger than last night. Early morning trekkers were hurrying past, breaking the solitude. It still amazed me that we were the only persons out there. It was Friday, and I knew that people would be arriving around noon to convert that situation. But as long as that was not happening, I was loving it. Seemed like Mandarmoni was a rare tourist spot right then, instead of being one of the most popular. I was contemplating this while getting on a trekker, my eyes always set on the vast unfurling turmoil taking place in the heart of the sea.

The sea side in early morning, with the Sun creeping out from behind the resorts

The trekker took a few minutes, but we finally reached what was the end of Mandarmoni beach, the mouth of Jolda river, entering the sea.  A mohana was one of my favourite kinds of places. It didn't look deep, there was a boat on the far side, and my mom wondered whether we would be able to walk barefooted through the river. But a woman who was selling tea in her stall on wheels said that the river was too deep in the middle, nearly neck-height, and anyway there was quicksand beneath the water. I found myself recalling the proverb, looks can be deceiving. Having a wonderful tea in the blowing salty wind made one of my best spent mornings ever, and I was glad I had woken up.

 

Jolda river and a boat. The other side of the river is Tajpur.

 

 

 

The Mohana

There was a surprise in store for us, in the form of beautiful red crabs scuttling across the sand. I was delighted. I saw thousands of them, peeking through holes in the sand and creeping back into them whenever we drew near. They were quadrangular in shape with little claws through their sides. Their colour was more beautiful than blood red. Only nature could gift such a perfect colour to the ones she shelters. From their front two antennas stuck out, which also seemed to have white eyes on their top. Most were shy, some had the courage to approach us, and one posed for a considerable time for us to take its photos. On the far side of the river, I could see even more red crabs sitting on the sand enjoying leisure. There was a reason trekkers were not allowed very near the river. The oil and heat and smoke and more importantly, the noise scared the hell out of them. I wondered if the sand near our resorts had crabs too, and if they were too scared to come out.

 

Posing for a photograph, the Red Crab is one of the most endangered species out there

Returning to Digante, another bath in the sea was necessary, and it was as much fun as the last one. In the back of our mind however, we knew he had to change resorts that day. It was the perk of booking hotels in the last minute, and unfortunately for the two days we spent there, we had to sleep at night in two different resorts. Around 11, we arrived at Marino Beach Resort, and I found myself coming back to the exact same spot where I had been that morning. It was the last resort on the beach, and across the river, I came to know that it was no longer Mandarmoni there, but Tajpur.

 

People bathing in the afternoon in front of the resort 

 

 

Marino Beach Resort

 

Marino Beach Resort was just as great as Digante, if not better. Owing to the extreme heat, we could only explore the surroundings in the afternoon. There was a small park and I sat on the swing, staring into the sea and occasionally chatting with my sister. Some minutes later, we were yet again on a trekker but this time, it was to go water sporting. This was one thing I hadn't done before and I was excited. We went on a Gemini Boat Ride, 8 people in all, into the sea. The sea had turned so greenish there that I was sure grass would sprout out of the water anytime. The surface didn't look like water, rather a thick green carpet flowing indefinitely creating waves and turbulence all over. I was mesmerised, and a few times I shouted in pure delight. It, though, was nothing compared to the amazing parasailing we did on the beach. Me and my sister, hooked tightly to the parachute, screamed loudly as we took off from the ground, and within a few seconds, we could see kilometres of sea on one side and fresh green agricultural lands and mud huts on the other. Yes, I'd never dangled before from such a great height, but the beauty of the scenery whipped away all the fear from my mind. We landed near our hotel, happy and content. Once in a lifetime experience, and I was glad I didn't miss that opportunity.

 

In the garden of Marino Resort

 

 

 

Gemini Boat Ride

 

 

 

Parasailing

 

 

We spent the rest of the evening sitting in the little shack beside the resort entrance, laughing and discussing what a beautiful trip it had been. After all, we would have to pack our bags and head home the next morning, and secretly I was wishing to stay a few more days. The rest of the evening was uneventful, with me and the other children in the tour watching TV and drinking soft drinks and playing games. Night came, like the next morning, and this time I slept till 8 am. My body had already begun to show signs of fatigue and I didn't make myself do anything more than I wanted to. Breakfast and lunch passed in a blur, and suddenly it was time to go home. Bidding goodbye to the sea, and promising to come back in the future, we made way to our ride back at Chaulkhola. On the way, I was surprised that the sea had come so close to the resorts. It was the mother of high tides! The half kilometre we had to walk the other day, just gone, disappeared underwater! People were bathing nevertheless. Just a day, and the population of Mandarmoni had soared by some hundreds. One could think it was Digha, not the quaint beach I'd seen this morning.

At Chaulkhola, I couldn't put a finger on what seemed lacking, inspite of all the fun we had. Once we were on the bus, I suddenly got the answer. It was the absence of laughter, of glee, of undiluted happiness and a sense of fulfilment on everyone's face. Going back when nobody really wanted to, kind of established the fact the amazing time we had down there. In our busy scheduled life, it was a forced decision to go out and enjoy some free time, only later it turned out not forced at all, but straight from our heart. We had been longing for freedom, and a little burst of that brought out the best in all of us. Yes, now I had to return to college, but I wasn't feeling sullen. I was refreshed and charged. Irony, isn't it, how a tiring trip can energise you?

I smiled thinking, hell yes, Kolkata, here I come (back)!

 

 

 

 

[Information for some of my friends:

 

Bus for Mandarmoni left from Dharmatala Bus Terminal. Estimated bus fare depends. Varies from 300 to 500 rupees.

Trekker from Chaulkhola took 600 rupees to transport 13 of us, one-way to Mandarmoni.

Hotel fare AC rooms, which I suggest one should take during summer, varies between 2500 to 3500 rupees for one night.

Gemini Boat ride takes 8 people on board and charges 1000 rupees. So does Parasailing, but only for 2 people. The rest of the water sports, like Banana boat ride, or speedboat, or waterbike charge between 600 to 1500 for multiple persons.]

THE BAY REVISITED: PART II

A valley of yellow greeted our eyes as we got down from the trekker. There was a row of small one-bedroom houses, all coloured yellow, except for the reception and the restaurant, which were brown. On the far side of the row, there were four two-storied guest houses with balconies in each of them. Unfortunately due to our late booking, we hadn't acquired the top rooms. But we weren't complaining. The only thing we direly required was cool shelter from the Sun.

Laying on the bed in our air-conditioned room seemed like the only option at noon. Outside I could see what seemed like blazing fire, accentuated by the colour of the resort houses. It was so bright and so hot, we all became a tad disappointed at our opportunity of going to the beach being crushed.

Somehow we made ourselves go outside and trot towards the restaurant for lunch. We were hungry no doubt. A full Bengali meal was promised and delivered and that too to our heart's content.Once we were full and nourished, I began to observe the resort with more attention.

There was a small rectangular water body situated within the confines of the houses. The body was surrounded by two rows of shrubs well maintained by the resort workers. I could hear ducks quacking without pause and assumed they were somewhere near the water but couldn't see them. A paved path lay between the water body and the houses, the reception being at the end of the path. The reception with its roof thatched with hay, was clearly the midpoint of the whole resort compound. Two rabbits were sitting in a cage there, nibbling at anything they found interesting. The children ran to the beautiful creatures and tried to touch them, squealing in delight.

We did manage to find the ducks later though

The other side of the resort compound was made to look almost like a beach. Tall trees dotted the sandy area with hammocks suspended between them. It seemed like a fun place to be, but alas, the intolerable incorrigible heat! We decided to go out when the heat had ebbed a little, and that was when we could go to the seaside.

Children on the hammocks

We crashed into our beds and didn't wake up until 4.30. The weather was a little better by then and this was enough reason for us to change in our beach clothes and rush out together through the resort gate.

Clearly, it was low tide because we had to practically walk half a kilometer before we could reach the edge of the shore. The water was warm and caressed our feet as it broke around us in the form of greenish blue waves. Being a Thursday the place was nearly deserted; there was only one other family beside us, as far as our eyes could go. It was a splendid opportunity, we realized, and spread out as wide as we could to brace the incoming waves.

Beach at the time of low tide

I need not describe the sea to anyone; it's the same as in any other beach. One thing we did sorely miss was the sunset, courtesy to the tall columns of clouds which were suddenly rushing inland. After half an hour, we could feel the level rising and water reaching further towards the beach. The low tide was ending. Still we sat, feeling the force of this vast sea on our bodies as it rushed above our shoulders  and heads, drenching us fully in salt water. The sky had turned a mixture of orange and blue with pale clouds lingering below it. Behind us, motorbikes and trekkers were moving past the seashore to their destinations and I wondered how far they would go. A hint of darkness had slowly begun to creep in and we got up reluctantly, not really eager to be pulled away in the increasing current of the sea.

Having fun at the beach

Darkness began to descend 

Night-time was basking with the silver glow of the Moon as we had our snacks and swung comfortably in the garden hammocks. A part of me wanted to swing like this forever, looking at the sky and watching the moon looking right back at me amidst the swaying tree tops. Looking for a way to mobilize our feet, we went to the seashore once again.

The sea was roaring with life and a strong gust from the sea hit us, removing all traces of the hot weather we were actually in. The Moon overlooked the long sea beach and shone down its silver glow on the crashing waves, spluttering water all around. It felt like the silver water drops were flowing out of the sea and making their way to the mysterious sky, as if sending offerings to Heaven. For a moment, we all forgot our lives and just stood there, taking it all in. That moment made me believe that magic did exist. The beauty and vastness of Nature was magical itself, functioning in tandem with our heartbeats, yet beyond our contemplation and leaving us in awe. The silver sea etched a deep place in my mind and heart and I knew for sure that I would never forget that wonderful night by the sea.

Towards the resort gate in the evening

The Moon over the treetops

THE BAY REVISITED: PART I

When you hear Mandarmoni, what do you envision? Somewhat like New Digha, but way cooler, fancier and kind of top-notch. You are not far from the mark actually. It is way cooler.

Decided just 5 days before our short trip, we weren’t sure if we could get any reservations in a bus or a seaside resort. Luckily through some old connections, we got reserved seats on an AC Volvo from Dharmatala Bus Terminal. Preparations were in full swing after that, but we still didn’t know what to expect there. Sure, I’d been to Digha, but I had no idea whether this neighbour would be any different. Plus, what with the sun raining heat waves upon us and frying us to death in Kolkata, we couldn’t imagine what the weather would be like at Mandarmoni. The seaside is supposed to be pleasant, right?

Following a tasty breakfast of luchi-ghugni at the bus terminal with family friends, we waited for the bus to arrive. The temperature had already begun to soar by 7 in the morning and we all wiped our faces in a futile attempt to keep ourselves sweat-free. The bus honked on its arrival and we climbed aboard. My first thought: Could any measure of gratitude BE ever sufficient for the cold hit of the air-conditioner on a day as hot as that? (Chandler-style)

Around 10, we got down at Chaulkhola. It is a junction village between the roads that lead to Digha and Mandarmoni, and is 14km away from the latter. The bus would continue to Digha and we would be en route to Mandarmoni on a trekker.

      

 

 

 

 

 

 We hailed a trekker from Chaulkhola

I am going to state directly: it was bloody hot out there! Without the humidity quotient, we felt like we just got out from the frying pan and went willingly into the fire. The trekker with its cool shed providing momentary relief, made its way through the village and vast farmlands (also an amusement park-under-construction), carrying 15 people in it, until we finally saw the horizon. Where land meets sea meets sky.

I thought we would stop right there, near the beach, but the trekker surprised me by turning and slowly launching itself on the yellow sand. Driving on the beach itself was something entirely new to me, not having that experience in any other beaches I’d visited (which were few to be honest). We could barely contain our excitement. After excitement, came pure joy as we banked right and directly entered the Digante Seaside Resort. I’d known we would live close to the sea, but this close?  This was amazing!

Mandarmoni boasts of a 13 km long motorable beach, probably the longest motorable beach road in India.

 

Digante Seaside Resort

Piku

Piku......motion se hi emotion

And its true to a T. As everyone has a rough idea, Bhaskor Banerjee (Amitabh Bachchan) has constipation. Piku (Deepika Padukone) is his working daughter, who takes care of his medical needs, his complaints, suggestions and erratic whims. Even after being irritated in her workplace meetings and date nights by Dad's complaints of colour and consistency of constipated stool, she puts up with him ------ how can you possibly make your big baby understand that what he's doing is irrational? He wants her to be a strong independent woman and not marry somewhere from where she couldn't take care of him during his needs. She wants him to stop whining all the time worrying unnecessarily about his health conditions (which seem normal except for the disturbed motion of the digestive tract).

Bhaskor Banerjee in many ways is a regular 70-year-old disease-riddled hypochondriac dad. His complaints and childish tantrums and weird discussions in front of other people gets to her daughter. But she remains silent; however her eyes scream in protest. After some time, her lips bend into a smile and she shakes her head, thinking about his silly notions and whimsical behaviour.

Then there is Rana, the cab company owner who drives the father-daughter duo to their hometown Kolkata. During their road trip, as Rana's twisted logic and cracky solutions begin to soften the bickering between the family members, the constipation condition starts to get better. Dad becomes better to reason with. Daughter opens up and relaxes. In many ways Rana acts as catalyst in the rebonding of emotions between them.

The famous cycling of Bhaskor shahib in the streets of Kolkata follow. He feels at home. He feels energised. He becomes happy. On returning home, he proclaims that it is his best day ever. And as you guessed it, is emotion se bhi motion juri hui hain. Best day ever equals to.....you know.

What happens in the end? I'm not going to tell that. That's for the viewers to find out. Dining table discussions of shit, road discussions of shit.....you get the general idea. Shit is everywhere. It is a very light hearted film  with a very strong delivery of unconditional love. Yes, that kind of love does exist. For inspite of many flaws, Bhaskor Banerjee is Piku's best man ever. Every person watching this piece of art will definitely identify himself or herself with it.

Another thing of mention is the flawless acting by the best of actors in this age. I'll be surprised if one of them doesn't win an award for this. Shoojit Sircar has once again delivered his level best, and we as hindi cinema fans are grateful for his filmmaking gifts. Anupam Roy wins our bong hearts with pleasant naturalistic music in The Journey Song and Bezubaan.

It's a perfect movie for a weekend watch. Missing it would be a considerable loss. Grab your family, your friends, or just grab yourself and a tub of popcorn as you laugh and say "aww" and wipe a tear away. You won't regret it.

 

My dwindling addiction to internet

Internet was one of the things that was close to magic for me. To me, magic is a form of advanced science that we don't yet understand. When I was 12 years old, I just didn't understand how I could reach the world with just logging on to a computer. Sure, computer helped me do my work and it also included games and Paint and movies and music, but to be connected to the world just a click away? Seemed surreal at the time. I have to admit, i still don't understand the technology behind WWW and LAN and WiFi, but they are no longer magic. They are facts that have become a necessity in our daily lives which we cannot live without. Our information encyclopedia is in our gadgets, bringing knowledge from around the world as we speak. We study, make our projects, read books and talk to people on the internet. In a nutshell, internet is a part of our lives. But it was not so.....10 years ago.

Just as a layman would get hooked to something he doesn't understand yet finds fascinating, I also was hooked to it. Whenever I got the chance I would sneak up to the computer table and turn the LAN connection on. However at first, my addiction was intertwined with frustration. Such slow internet connection with the google page opening up in no less than 30 seconds was enough to turn my patience into ashes. But that even made me more hooked. I opened up all the websites of my fantasies and emailed my friends, sending and receiving pictures so dear to me at the time. I didn't have to telephone or say anything to a person I know. I just emailed them and they emailed me back. Writing became my favourite hobby, or should I say typing!

That was until social networking sites came along. I came across Orkut but could not understand what it was meant for. All I knew was that my friends were there and I could chat with them. Two people talking back and forth like real talking......now that was something! By the time I got used to the ways of Orkut, I had not realised my friends were leaving that site. I heard they had moved on to a similar kind of website known as Facebook. After stalling for some time (because I loved Orkut), I joined the mega social networking. Sure, I admit I had a hard time figuring my way around because it was more complex than Orkut, but I succeeded eventually. It was a blast: once I understood it, it was the best website to connect to people.

I became more and more familiar and addicted to Facebook partly because of its amazing features, and partly because I was in a relationship for the first time. We didn't get to meet much, and so we connected out there, which was cool. He was an amazing artist, his sketches were a class in its own.....so I kept a watchful eye over his picture folders to catch the latest addition. All in all, I had a great time.....but the decline of the whole situation had just begun which I didn't realise.

Because of my constant talking and communicating over the internet, I forgot how to talk to him when I was with him. I didn't know what to say to him, through my own mouth! It was as if I was there to observe him, then I would go home and pour my heart out by typing away in Facebook. It got way out of hand, and my studies were suffering in the most crucial year of my whole life. One bad result in the exam would diminish my chances by a large margin of being something successful in life. So I controlled myself and got the hell out of the whole internet business addiction thing for good, just until my exams were over that is. I still did Facebook but for limited time for limited things. Internet ceased to be my pastime. My boyfriend did not perceive this diminished contact very well, so drifts became apparent in our relationship. This continued for almost a year. Due to my internet addiction, I was only a girlfriend on digital terms, but in real social life, I wasn't even a person he could freely talk to. Same was he for me. With time, as I broke off from the internet, we broke apart too. Funny how we broke up on the internet and never saw each other again.

That was the moment. After that time, I was no longer addicted or nearly as interested by the internet as I once was. I got good scores, made to a great college, and forgot what it was like feeling high while being online. There was a time when I could not pass three hours before checking Facebook. Now I can go on for more than three days without realising I have not checked my notifications the whole time.

My addiction has faded. My interest hasn't however, but it is significantly lower. It may have been due to my break up, or may have been due to the one year break I had from the internet. It was hard, staying away from it for most of the day, but as I put a year into that, it became easier. Maybe because the internet had become so familiar with our lives that there was nothing new left to explore. All these reasons are partly responsible for my dwindling addiction to internet. I am a fan of socially intermixing with people, and internet can never replace that. Real relationships with people are everlasting, and I prefer that to a temporary friendship in the digital world, every time you ask me!

Internet is awesome, sure, but not worth your addiction. That's my last comment.